Dear Automakers: Get Your Ads Out of Our Cars

You’ve heard it a million times: A car is often the second-most-expensive purchase a person will ever make. It’s never been truer than today. With skyrocketing costs and expensive credit (not to mention other factors) driving up prices across the board, shoppers are desperate for options that won’t break the bank. So, how are automakers responding to this clamor? By trying to milk even more money from their customers, of course.

I’m 42; I grew up in the era of “bean counters.” These nefarious little nannies were blamed for every cool model that didn’t make it to our shores, and every sweet performance option left on the table (not to mention every part that fell off of an American car built between 1979 and 1999). They were nothing but thieves of joy, cutting costs at the expense of fun—the boogeymen in the back room telling the engineers that we weren’t allowed to have fun.

I never thought I’d speak of that era with any sort of fondness, but here we are, in 2026, and the accounting autocracy of the late 20th century seems like a paradise next to the Black Mirror-verse slowly settling in around us. Our latest reminder of just how much everything sucks right now comes from BMW (by way of @metav3rse on Instagram).

Yep, that’s a promotional spot for Spider-Man… and the iX3, somehow? And done in soft, friendly tones intended to soothe you. It’s a cute, cuddly, entirely innocuous little clip in the same vein of Google’s search doodles—remember when those still felt harmless? It’s fine if you don’t; that moment passed nearly a decade ago.

The Bavarians aren’t strictly alone in this strategy, broadly speaking. Jeep is doing it, and even Toyota will try to up-sell you on a subscription for its infotainment service using its touchscreen real estate. But the example before us is particularly egregious, especially since it’s not simply selling you on BMW parts or accessories. It’s a full-blown ad for a non-automotive product—a movie, of all things.

This strikes me as the sort of thing a marketing type might call a “cross-promotional opportunity” rather than “advertisement,” but that really means you’re watching not one but two separate ads: one for a Marvel movie and the other for BMW. I expect there’s also some sort of BMW product placement within the movie itself (sure enough), which is yet another billboard for further euphemistically labeled corporate revenue orgies. Mmmmm… can’t you just smell all that synergy!?

I get that automakers still have accountants to please and shareholders to satisfy, but this sort of naked greed serves no one but the MBAs patting each other on the back for their clever little play. Enough is enough. Get this off our screens.

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