One of the highlights of Tesla’s “We, Robot” event wasn’t the self-driving cars but the allegedly autonomous robots. Tesla’s Optimus bot isn’t new, but this is the first event where actual robots joined the stage—and the crowd—rather than a person in a robot costume. Or was it?
Apparently, Tesla Optimus robots are not autonomous artificial intelligence (AI). At least not fully, according to the robots themselves. AI aficionado Robert Scoble attended the Thursday night event and immediately had his doubts about whether the drunk-dad dancing, drink-pouring, and rock-paper-scissors-playing robots were really making decisions on their own. So, Scoble did what any blood-and-bones person would do: He asked.
The conversion was reminiscent of one you’d have with a 10-year-old about whether he finished his dinner. When Optimus Number Thirty-something was asked how much AI it really was, it fidgeted with its fingers as if pondering what to say. Its answer was ultimately a non-answer.
“I can’t disclose just how much,” replied a very human-sounding male voice. “That’s something you’ll just have to find out later.”
Laughing, Scoble egged on the robot, asking, “Some [AI] or none?”
After another pensive pause, the Telsa robot responded, “I would say it might be some. I’m not gonna confirm, but it might be some.”
First of all, Siri or Alexa would never utter “gonna.” Oh, how SoCal of you, Optimus. Also, when looking at the actions of the AI robots, a lot of it is stuff that could easily have been premeditated and pre-programmed. The dancing troupe could be running on pre-programmed software. Its interaction with the crowd could also be a program running on a loop. Keep in mind that they were fixed into their positions as well. If there is a large enough audience, that “wave” could be to anyone, really.
Same with the dozen or so robots that walked out when introduced. The march itself could have been programmed. Though the random wandering through the crowd could be AI, the interactions were suspiciously human. Any video you find online of the robots talking, the voices feel human. Not one sounds like a machine.
During the rock-paper-scissors games, the robots sometimes appear to merely mimic their opponent. We know from previous Tesla trickery that the bots are adept as copycats. Is playing children’s games the follow-up to shirt folding? How… lame. I mean, that’s it? What about something more complicated and engaging like, I don’t know, Uno?
Let’s say these Optimus bots are, in fact, fully AI. Even if they can “do anything you want,” per Tesla boss Elon Musk, what a disappointment because they are really slow. One can only imagine how long it would take Optimus to get groceries from the family Cybertruck. At the rate it currently plays rock paper scissors, that milk might spoil en route to the fridge.
I wouldn’t want a personal $30,000 robot to look like a human if it means a lack of efficiency. Make it like Rosey the Robot from The Jetsons and add some wheels. Maybe even a claw to grab the lost and forgotten items behind the couch. Ooh, an arm that extends? That would be a true bestie to hang out on the couch with, and neither of you would have to get up for another bag of chips while watching sportsball.
The fact is Optimus Gen 2 (and any subsequent generation) will never live up to its name. For one, it’s a humanoid robot and not a dear-to-my-heart red Freightliner cab-over semi-truck. The cartoon robots remain cool and fascinating while the real-life ones, although high-tech, are underwhelming in comparison. Surely, we can be more imaginative than this?
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